That wasn’t me, that was alter ego

I’m a recently single lady who has been dipping her toe back in to the dating scene. And I’ll admit, as a librarian, I’m a bit hesitant to tell people what I do for a living. I’m not ashamed of what I do by any means. However, there is this stereotype that seems to persist among men. Librarians = sexy librarians = sexually adventurous women.

While I will not get in to the specifics of my sex life, I find it difficult to date someone who sees my profession as a definition of how I am in general. Sure I have the standard issue librarian (hipster) glasses, a knitting obsession and perhaps an affinity for sensible shoes. But besides that, I fit very few library stereotypes.

I’ve spent a good portion of my adult life striving to have a “thing”. I have a friend who is an MMA fighter. Another who is the roller derby girl. And another who is a competitive eater. Ok, so that last one is a friend of a friend but the point remains: I know some pretty outrageous people. And I’ve kind of wanted to be known for my own “thing”.

Turns out my schtick is being a librarian.

And with it comes a multitude of accurate and inaccurate assumptions.

When I put together my online dating profile, I seriously considered not indicating my current profession. Even putting down “former graphic designer” seemed more appealing than librarian. I didn’t exactly want to be contacted by several guys who only wanted to talk to me because I was a sexy librarian. I have a lot more going for me than that, boys.

I won’t deny I’ve played up the assumptions occasionally (I’ve used the librarians are hiding something line more than I should) However, I find that when that’s all a guy wants to discuss I immediately am turned off.

On one hand, it’s incredibly flattering. I like to believe that the librarian fantasy is based on an attraction to intelligence (and assumed side effect of having your MLS). On the other, I think a guy immediately assumes he knows what I’m going to be like to date or sleep with. And I hate the idea of being pigeonholed.

So for now, I am up front about it, but I definitely have my creep radar on high trying to feel out who is out there to get to know me and who is interested in just meeting my alter ego.


About indie librarian

a recently MLS librarian's observations
This entry was posted in Dating, Librarian and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to That wasn’t me, that was alter ego

  1. Pingback: my “thing” | the indie librarian

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